My munchkins are getting into some mischief at school (talking, not paying attention, etc.). Here’s what I picked up in communicating – and not communicating – with the preschool teachers.
* Teachers don’t want to be thought of as not being able to handle their classroom or their students. Even if your child is acting in a matter that you don’t feel is appropriate, the teacher may not tell you or tell you the extent to which your child is misbehaving in fear of appearing that she doesn’t have control of her class. However, this becomes an issue later when/if the behavior escalates.
* Teachers make excuses too. I’ve made my own excuses – like he’s not being challenged (but he acts up in the hall and during nap time). Teachers have told me repeatedly that my son is ‘just being a boy.’ And I bought into it. However, I wish I had nipped that in the bud the first time. Boys are active, but if it’s getting them into trouble, you should pay special attention.
* Your child may act differently at home than at school. There are more kids at school and different scenarios than what’s at home. Be open to the teacher describing a different behavior or reaction in your child.
* Ask specific questions of the teacher. If your child received a sad face, a red flag, or an ‘N’, get the details. Ask, “How many times did you have to reprimand my child today?” “Were any other children involved?” “What kind of disciplinary action was taken?” This will speak volumes about any behavioral issues.
* The teacher doesn’t want to get your child into (too much) trouble. Can you believe it? Even after the mayhem he/she caused. She may downplay the situation in fear that you will overreact (I’ve been accused of doing that 🙂 ). You’ve got to drill down (pass all of these emotions) to the issue at hand – your child’s behavior!
I’ve also learned that my kids – even the 3y.o. – know how to leave out details … no, no, no … I mean LIE about a situation. Already?!?! But, they tell me the truth later (I think 🙂 ).
I really do think my sons’ teachers are great! We are all still getting to know each other – and I’m still learning this whole ‘school thing’ from a parents’ perspective. The teachers and administration are extremely helpful and team-oriented and I’m grateful for that!
But it’s weird though …my kids get into a little trouble, and I end up learning the lessons. Go figure.
What’s been your experience?